a little c

because I refuse to give it a big one

pfft.

Posted by wendy on 2011/03/09

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I hate being bald.  I mean, I hate it.  Screw rocking it, I wear a hat or a wig everywhere.   I’m constantly cold, I hate when people stare at me, and frankly, I don’t FEEL pretty.  But, I  wasn’t really feeling it with short hair, either, so one thing has been established:  Wendy will be growing her hair until it hits her waist again, kthx.  It’s just who I am, it’s what I like and part of how I feel pretty and feminine.

George likes his chicken spicy and Wendy likes her hair long.

I’m out of sorts today.  Physically, I feel really good, but of course tomorrow is chemo, so I have a really large cloud of dread and doom hanging over me.  It’s really hard to sit here and know that this time tomorrow I’ll have a mouth and throat full of metal and be too tired to do dishes or cook dinner.  So, yeah.  Dread.   The upside is that this is my last AC treatment, which marks the halfway point of my chemo.  Halfway is good.  After this, I have  4 Taxol treatments and then I’m done with chemo.  Hopefully, forever.

I’m also feeling a bit housebound, I think.  Too much time at home and not enough out in the world.  I’m lonely and while I do love my dogs dearly, it’s just not the same as having  an actual human to talk to.  I think I need to get out into the world more, somehow.

meh.   With a side of fist shaking.

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8 Responses to “pfft.”

  1. heathre said

    times like these, we really need that flickr teleporter so we could all pop in and hang out with you. xoxo thinking of you lots.

  2. wendy said

    I know! I am so damn isolated from my friends here. It really does wear on me occasionally. Not that my family isn’t awesome–cause they are. I would just dearly love a girl’s night out.

  3. pete said

  4. Maite said

    Come stay with me, I’ll rub yummy smelling creams on your bald head and when we get tired of that I will paint dragonflies, and butterflies, and knives and lace and stuff all over it. We’ll take pictures and then do it all over again the next day. mkay?

    Thinking of you tomorrow and every day.
    xoxo

  5. wendy said

    Wendy ❤ Pete

    oooo..Maite! That's what I need. Love you.

  6. Jett said

    GIRL. If you want my digits, I will slide them to you and you can pick an afternoon that you want to get out. I will motor over there and we can go do whatever you like!

    Drop me a line and let me know if you want to. XO

  7. wendy said

    It really IS high time you and I got together and got up to some hijinx, I think. Seriously. I’m usually out of commission the first week after chemo (going to the grocery store is like a cross-country trek-yay fatigue!), but by next weekend and after? I’m good to go! Let’s dooo eet.

  8. girl I soooo hated being bald, i had racing stripes on my noggin they thought were stains on the skull plate from AC, nice huh? I liked the hair in braids (wig of course) with a bandana look myself it worked for me, but not a cheesey zsa zsa look…anyway, same here took me five damn years to get my long hair back you will get to year five and have that beautiful hair back and this will all seem so far away…just keep swimming girl….

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