a little c

because I refuse to give it a big one

Combustible Lemons.

Posted by wendy on 2011/05/04

Tomorrow is Chemo #8!  I can’t believe it’s my very last chemo.  There is a surreal haze surrounding me this week.  The final chemo, and then next week, I leave for 2 glorious weeks in England with M and I keep thinking…”Really?  REALLY?  That’s madness, because I cannot be finished and I am certainly not well enough to travel!”.  And, yet…there you go.  Done and leaving.

In the realm of “Are you kidding me?”–I am lamenting the very recent loss of my eyebrows and eyelashes.  (they’re not entirely gone–there’s just enough left of each to look really, really stupid.  grrr.)  I’m a bit disappointed this didn’t happen earlier, because I was kind of thinking that the end of chemo meant this would all start growing back (and it IS growing back on my head–I have a very fine layer of down covering my head at the moment), and I was so relieved that I, at least, kept my eyebrows.  Ah, well.  There goes my ability to look surprised or super angry. Unless I draw it in, and if I do that, I’ll have to decide on a mood and keep it all day–and where’s the fun in that?  Maybe I need to invest in some stick-on eyebrows so I can switch it up as my mood changes.

I’m bald.   I have half of an eyebrow over each eye.  Most of my eyelashes are gone.  But, I have to shave my legs every. single.day.  There has to be someone I can complain to about this, because I am so planning to give all these damn lemons back:

8 Responses to “Combustible Lemons.”

  1. Cindy said

    Yay for the last treatment and a trip to England. Say Hi to the Queen for me.

    About the eyebrows – I don’t have any either. I have trichotillomania so I pull mine out (along with my hair and eyelashes). I use an angled brush to lightly color in (dark brown powdered eyeliner) along the brow ridge and then I use a very, very light coat of mascara to darken the hairs that are there. Makes a big difference just being able to see a bit of a line of the brow.

    Have a wonderful trip! I just love England.

  2. wendy said

    Yeah, I guess I need to start practicing now so I won’t look like a clown when I leave the house. hahaha. Thanks for the tips, Cindy. ❤

  3. Joelle said

    Ok, so your lashes and brows waited a while before deciding to leave town, so MAYBE your leg hair will like, up and vanish as your lashes and hair grow back in. A girl can dream, right?

    Have a fabulous time in England. I miss it there, so lovely this time of year.

  4. wendy said

    Seriously. MY LEGS!!! That was the cruelest blow of all. Well, okay. The cancer was a cruel blow, but I’m still pretty upset about the leg hair. hahahaha! I’m so excited to get back to England. I really miss it, too.

  5. feistybluegecko said

    I hope it all went smoothly today – what an incredible feeling at that last one, I know. I also travelled just after my treatment (had 5 weeks radiation after treatment) and though I was still feeling pretty weak it was so good to get back to the UK and see family and friends for a few weeks.

    I love the way you talk about your eyebrows – mine also did a runner in the last days of chemo, to my astonishment. Your description of drawing them on and then having to keep that expression all day is wonderful. (today is Surprise Day, tomorrow long lost friend day etc) And yes, so unfair about the leg hair!

    Good luck and bon voyage from rainy Myanmar

  6. well the bad news is the eyebrows are gone, the good news is only for about a few weeks since TODAY IS THE LAST DAY OF STUPID CHEMO!!!! Woke up thinking about you today, the last chemo is so bittersweet. Enjoy the day girl, you made it, you won this battle now win the war!

  7. wendy said

    Oh you guys–it IS bittersweet. I love everyone at the clinic so dearly, and it’s actually kind of a relief to know that I will be back for check-ups and port flushing, etc. At least I don’t have to leave them cold-turkey. I’m horribly excited about England, because I love it there so much and I MISS it and I miss my boyfriend and I’m still running on steriods (ha) and adrenaline this morning, so I’m all hyper–that will last ALL day, and then tomorrow my old friend BONE PAIN will drop by for a visit, but he only stays a few days, and this is the LAST TIME, so I can take it. I’M DONE!!!!!

  8. well wendy I picture you a 40’s girl on a ship, hanky waving as you depart to england, bon voyage bone pain, bon voyage chemo, bon voyage indeed. You go girl, you did it, you did it you did it.



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